Dating Double Dutch

It has been more than six years since I've been involved with a man. 

It has been more than six years since I've dated a man.

It has been more than five years since ... well, you know. Since I've done THAT with a man.

Over the past few months, as I've continued to heal, grow, and work on myself, my therapist has really encouraged me to step into the light and start back dating. Trust me when I tell you that it is not something I have looked forward to doing -- for a number of reasons.

I'm divorced so I am a bit jaded from that relationship. And, of course, I am skeptical of men and their intentions.

I have kids now. They are my ultimate priority. No man will ever take a front seat to my boys.

I know myself a lot better now. So, I am not as likely to put up with the bullshit behavior I did years ago when I first met my now ex-husband.

Yet, now, there is the concept of online and social media dating. And there is something about using those methods to date that just doesn't sit well with me. When you're dating online, it is easy to create a life outside of real life that gives the impression that the real life doesn't even exist when it in actuality it does. Did you get that? 

And that is the scary part about dating online. But, I'm doing it, despite my angst. I am trying to use the things I've learned from therapy and The School of Hard Knocks to help me navigate this moment in my life. But, I would be remiss if I didn't mention that it is SCARY. And I ain't no punk. But, damn. lol.

I don't know what will happen with my online dating adventures. I do know that I am trying to take it all in stride and not have any expectations. And that is a big change for me. To just go ... without a true destination. With all the trauma I experienced in the last few years, I believe I deserve this moment in my life.